Anyone who has ever had to experience a business course of one form or another (and they seem to crop in the arts as well these days) will be familiar with the awfulness of management-speak...


The  Triads
...an homage to management speak


With a face as straight
As a plum line,
The course leader spoke.
 
“We’d like you to work in triads.”

Looking worriedly over my shoulder, I search,
For Japanese gangsters,
Scary knives,
Tattooed agents of evil,
Illegal drugs.
And the prospect of martial arts madness.

I realise what my fate will be.
Yes!
I shall be working in a three!!!!


My, my, my, thought I.
Working in threes is so passé
Let’s try and say it another way.
Then we’ll sound much more impressive
And people will listen to our message.


You could paint in triptychs,
Hum in trios,
Pray in trinities
Eat caviar in a troika,
Make flags in tricolours,
Discuss genetics in triplets,
Float new ideas in trimarans
Reinvent the wheel in tricycles,
Have a stab at solving the problem in tridents,
Ponder the shape of things to come in triangles,
and tell people to sod off using management speak in triplicate
and tell people to sod off using management speak in triplicate
and tell people to sod off using management speak in triplicate.


* Duncan Jones says "Me in 20 words: always liked to write find out more at www.molethepoet.com"